My father died suddenly on Sunday. He’d gone into the hospital on Saturday morning for a sharp pain in his back, thinking “maybe it’s just a kidney stone.” They diagnosed an aneurysm in his aorta (pressing on his kidney, which was how he felt it) and scheduled the cardiac work-up for the next morning, intending surgery to put in a stent. The aneurysm burst in the night. My step-mom was there, holding his hand when he left us.

People (of course) keep asking me how I’m doing. I suppose I’m still somewhat stunned. Sunday was the hardest day, day one of my loss. This week has been odd since I cannot afford time off from work. I’m in the office every day, trying my best. My sister is the choreographer for a show and she’s stuck in rehearsals all week. So although I might have visited with her after work, she’s not home until after 10:30 pm. Instead, I’ve been going to my dance classes, because what else will I do with my time? Dancing, sweating, working, distracting, and getting hugs from several dozen very close dancer friends. That’s all I’ve got right now, plus my Sweetie, who’s been amazing.

I started drafting a eulogy yesterday. Dad’s obituary was printed today. I fly back to Ohio on Monday evening next week, the funeral is Tuesday, I fly back home on Wednesday. Also, Social media is very weird.